Assignment 1: Error Analysis
I. Professional Profile
| Version 1 (Original) | Version 2 (Corrected) | Comments/Types of Errors |
| Having completed a C1 (Advanced diploma) in French from Alliance Française, Smita Shenoy has acquired an above-average level in the language—both written and spoken. She is already freelancing as a content editor, copyeditor and proof-reader for English language content. She now wishes to explore similar or different opportunities in the domain of French language. She regards the opportunity to intern with Modilingua as the perfect chance to explore the numerous possibilities to gain access to her desired area of work. |
Having completed She is She now wishes to explore She regards the opportunity to intern with |
1. Sounds more professional 2. Capital A not required 3. Adding location will make it more specific 4. Adding the word ‘proficiency’ makes it well‑rounded. 5. Word not necessary 6. Options seems a better word than opportunities. Specifying the types of assignments sought makes the profile well-rounded. 7. Spelling errors, especially in proper nouns, could be embarrassing and may lead to termination of contract with the client. |
2. Career Goals
| Version 1 (Original) | Version 2 (Corrected) | Comments/Types of Errors |
| 41 seems to be a bit late in the day to be evaluating career goals, but as wise people have said: age is just a number. I always had a strong inclination towards two things: creative writing and copyediting. Besides, I also had a passion for learning new languages. Unfortunately, my career path did not quite follow any of these passions or interests. Peer pressure led me to pursue a degree in commerce and when I got a job—a well-paid one at that—in an MNC, I thought my professional future was sealed. In spite of trying sincerely for a few years, however, I realised that ‘number crunching’ and reconciling bank statements is not for me. At 35, I finally decided to take a risk and change my career path. I sent in a couple of articles to a publishing house whose main publication was a women’s magazine. They liked my work and I joined the company as a content writer and copyeditor. After a few years there, I moved on to another publishing house—this time school text books—as assistant editor. Meanwhile, I was pursuing a language course in French from Alliance Française de Madras and completed my C1 (Advance) diploma in the language in 2017. Now I have quit my job at the publishing house as I wish to focus completely on freelancing. Thanks to my experience with the publishing houses, I am able to get editing and proofing assignments. The challenge I am facing now is with my second career goal. I want to put my knowledge of French to good use by venturing into online teaching or translation work. But my lack of work experience in the domain of French language is proving to be a bane. I feel that some much-needed insight and input in how to market myself in this field will prove invaluable in clinching potential contracts. I am confident that this internship will help me achieve my career goals. |
I have always had a strong inclination towards two things: creative writing and copyediting. Besides, I also have Unfortunately, my career path did not quite follow any of these passions or interests. In spite of trying sincerely for a few years, however, I realised that ‘number crunching’ and reconciling bank statements is not for me. At 35, I finally decided to take a risk and change my career path. I sent They liked my work and I joined the company as a content writer and copyeditor. After a few years there, I moved on to another publishing house—this time school text books—as assistant editor. Meanwhile, I was pursuing a language course in French from Alliance Française de Madras and completed my C1 (a Now I have quit my job at the publishing house as I wish to focus Thanks to my experience with the publishing houses, I am able to The challenge I am facing now is with my second career goal. I want to put my knowledge of French to good use by venturing into online teaching or translation work. But my lack of work experience in the domain I feel that some much-needed insight I am confident that this internship will help me achieve my career goals. |
1. It is better to start a sentence with number names instead of numbers. 2. ‘little’ sounds more professional than ‘bit’. 3. It is better to use present perfect with ‘always’ if the sentence suggests something that continues. 4. For the abovementioned reason, use present tense. 5. It is better to use active voice as much as possible, especially if the subject is known. 6. A semicolon helps break a long sentence more efficiently than ‘and’. 7. Here, ‘sent’ conveys the meaning clearly. Hence, ‘in’ can be deleted. 8. ‘textbooks’ is one word. 9. Lowercase ‘a’ is okay. 10. redundant 11. can be deleted 12. ‘secure’ sounds more professional and formal. 13. Already mentioned above, so can be deleted. 14, can be deleted as ‘insight’ conveys the meaning. 15. insight ‘into’, not ‘in’ |
| Error Analysis Total Number of Source Text: 410 Total Number of Target Text: 405 |
|
| Errors related to articles | 0 |
| Errors related to punctuation, symbols, signs, spaces | 2 |
| Omissions | 1 |
| Spelling errors | 1 |
| Choice of words | 8 |
| Factual errors | 1 |
| Choice of words and overall consistency of those words | 1 |
| An eye for details | Some details were missing |
| Page layout and overall presentation | Present |
| Profile Photo Quality | Not applicable here. Profile photo resolution did not match with what was required. |
| Additional comments if any | Few changes were suggested to improve flow and sentence structure. |
| Time taken to correct 410 words: | 20 Minutes |
| Time taken to prepare this evaluation report: | 15 Minutes |
