ERROR ANALYSIS: CAREER GOALS ESSAY
| Version 1 – Draft version | Version 2 – Corrected version | Comments/Types of errors |
| I participated in a number of cultural competitions for a student’s organization called UBES, which promotes students’ involvement with cultural activities and provides an environment in which one can put certain skills into practice. | I participated in a number of cultural competitions for a student’s organization called UBES, which promotes students’ involvement with cultural activities and provides an environment in which an individual can put certain skills into practice. | Accuracy. The pronoun one is too vague to be used in an academic essay. |
| Also, I participated in the Student Union as Press Secretary for two years and as a Secretary-General during my senior year. | Also, I participated in the Student Union as Press Secretary for two years and as Secretary-General during my senior year. | No article needed. |
| In my job as Press Secretary, I was in charge of informing through social media and other mediums available within the institution our proposals, projects carried out and achievements gained throughout the school year and the organization of certain events. | In my job as Press Secretary, I was in charge of informing our proposals, projects carried out and achievements gained throughout the school year and the organization of certain events, through social media and other mediums available within the institution. | Syntax, word order. |
| Also, as a Secretary-General, I was the president and vice-president’s right hand and because of my great skills for communication and interpersonal relationships I acted as the bridge between the students and the principal. | Also, as Secretary-General, I was the president and vice-president’s right hand and because of my great skills for communication and interpersonal relationships I acted as the bridge between the students and the principal. | No article needed. |
| This allowed me to develop even more my communication skills and to grow a capacity for empathy. | This allowed me to develop my communication skills even more and to grow a capacity for empathy | Word order; syntax. |
| …when I graduated from high school, I was chosen valedictorian based on not only academic, but also humanitarian performance. | …when I graduated from high school, I was chosen valedictorian based not only on academic, but also on humanitarian performance. | Wrong use of the preposition; article omitted. |
| I believe that in order to be a good translator having knowledge of the languages is not enough, culture is almost as important. | I believe that in order to be a good translator, having knowledge of the languages is not enough, as culture is almost as important. | Punctuation (there should be a comma after translation because of the use of the following construction: in order to be a good translator, …) and in the first draft the connector “as” is missing. |
| Besides Spanish and English, I will to study French so as to acquire a language C and be able to become a translator and interpreter of the United Nations. |
Besides Spanish and English, I will study French so as to acquire a language C and be able to become a translator and interpreter of the United Nations. |
Unnecessary addition. |
| Error Analysis Total Number of Source Text: 865 Total Number of Target Text: 865 |
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ERROR ANALYSIS: PROFESSIONAL PROFILE
| Version 1 – Draft version | Version 2 – Corrected version | Comments/Types of errors |
| I am Virginia L. Rodriguez, I am from Argentina and I am studying to become a Public Translator of English in School of Languages, National University of Córdoba. | I am Virginia L. Rodriguez, I am from Argentina and I am majoring in English Translation in School of Languages, National University of Córdoba | Register; choice of words. |
| During my free time, I like reading, playing tennis and traveling as much as I can, as for me it is the best way to learn about other cultures. |
During my free time, I like reading, playing tennis, and traveling as much as I can, as for me it is the best way to learn about other cultures. |
Punctuation. |
| Error Analysis Total Number of Source Text: 180 Total Number of Target Text: 176 |
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